back on my mat...

Two months post baby and I'm back on my mat! Finally... it has felt like an eternity!

To say I was nervous would be an understatement. From the time I scheduled the class to the moment it began I had butterflies. I had been obsessing over it.

What if I can't hold any of the poses? What if I can't chaturanga? What should I wear? Nothing fits right yet! Are my boobs going to leak?

I felt like a yoga virgin.

If you're intimidated by a workout invite someone to join you. I promise it will take the edge off. I invited some really awesome people to join me. As you can see from the photo we're not your average bunch of weirdos. We're a very special bunch of weridos and I wouldn't change a thing about any of 'em.

I started sweating in the car on my drive to the studio. When I arrived the parking lot was PACKED. I spent five minutes looking for a place to park where I wouldn't have to worry about being towed. Like, I needed one more thing to think about during my return to my mat.

There were about 500 more people than I've ever seen at the studio before. Proof that my studio owner friends are kicking a lot of ass. Congrats, ladies! I got signed in and put away my stuff. Maybe there wouldn't be any spaces left to practice. Shit, shit, shit... I should have left sooner!

My friends are... awesome. When I entered the room they all started clapping and cheering, and making a scene. I felt SO special! I choked back tears (becuase I cry all the time!) They had saved me a spot right smack in the middle of the insanely packed room. I recieved lots of hugs and overwhelming support. People were excited to see me. It was the first time since having the baby that no one asked about her when they first saw me. I was myself. I wasn't just "Marley's Mom."

Class began and my nerves had left the building. I was home. I was on my mat.

There were many times where I caught myself "trying too hard," forgetting that I had just had a baby several weeks before. I needed to be gentle with my new post baby body. I was able to laugh at myself when certain poses we're really out of the question and my friend, Monica, next to me had no problem joining me in that laughter.

There were a few times that my mind drifted to my baby. What was she doing? Is she crying for me? Was she going to be in bed before I get home? I took a deep breath, recognized these feelings were normal, and moved on. She was in capable hands and I needed this hour of alone time.

The instructor had asked about my favorite song earlier in the week when she found out I'd be making my comeback in her class. I was eagerly awaiting to see how she would incorporate RHCP's "Can't Stop" into the class and she certainly exceeded my expectations. She announced it was my first class back and in celebration that we would be holding a 4 minute bridge pose to my favortie song! It was awesome. The whole class started singing to the chorus. I'll never forget the energy in that room. It totally rocked.

I coudln't have asked for a better experience my first class back. I really felt like myself again. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE being "Marley's Mom," but I really LOVE being ME.

 

 

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