so you want to be a goal coach...

I’ve been asked by several folks lately “how do I goal coach someone?”While it may seem like some difficult task, it’s actually really easy. All you need to do to commit to helping others reach their fullest potential is listen, listen, listen… and ask questions.

First step is to set up a time to meet. I love coffee dates. Or Whole Foods dates. Sharing coffee is one of my favorite things to do… goal talk or not.

To prep someone to be goal coached you just need to let them know to leave all their “ifs, ands, & buts” at the door. They are not welcomed here. We need to start from a place of “anything and everything is possible.”

I like to get to know what is most important to people. A person’s core values should be at the heart of all of their goals. Examples of a core value are: expression, family, experience, love, balance. A core value is something that a person would fight to the death for- something that can’t be taken away from them. Let’s role play:

Sam: What is one of your core values?

Lady Gaga: Family.

Sam: What is it about family? Unpack that for me.

Lady Gaga: I can always count on my family. They don’t judge me. I can confide anything in them.

Sam: Good. Non- judgment. Trust. Loyalty. Commitment.

Lady Gaga: Yeah, loyalty and commitment. I would do anything for them and I know they would do anything for me.

Do you see how I un-rooted a deeper value for Lady Gaga? The words loyalty and commitment for Lady Gaga made her heart sing! It sat really well and captured the essence of why family is so important to her. These words excited her and from here we can set really powerful and intentional goals that are in line with what is most important to her.

Next, talk about vision.  In one of my previous blog posts I talk about vision setting. It’s about setting your mind free to wander and lust for the future you’ve always wanted. It may be hard to do a vision exercise in public (noise and what not) but ask them who they see when they picture themselves 10 years from now. What do they look like? Who are they with? How do they feel? How do they make money? What do they do in their free time? We set our goals to get us to where we want to be in 10 years so this step is really important. You’ll probably come across folks who say they “don’t know what they want in 10 years.” Ask them what they are afraid of? You’ll never get what you want if you don’t put it out into the world. Ouch, that stings!

Now to the good stuff…as if it wasn’t juicy enough already! GOALS! I like to start 10 years out and work backwards.  When phrasing goals, have the person use the “I am, by when” method. Literally fill in the blanks… I am ___ by ____. Speaking as if we already own that goal and putting a date on when will be what keeps us tied to our word.

Example: I own a beachfront property by June 2022

Okay, so what do we need to get there? Do we need money to buy it? Yes, probably. Is that inspiring? Not really. Maybe you’ve acquired your dream job in 5 years and it brings in the money you need for your beach front property.

Example: I am a writer for the New York Times by January 2017

Great! So what steps do you need to take NOW to get you to your dream job? Maybe you’ve never written anything? Maybe you’ve started a blog?

Example: I have 2000 followers on my blog by December 2012.

This means people enjoy reading your writing. It’s a platform for you to practice your craft.

Can you see the trickle down affect? Each one of those goals is in line with each other and is uniquely inspiring all on their own. A lot of times people just write a whole bunch of goals they don’t have a lot of cohesion.  Your job as their goal coach is to help them with this. Be their guide to their own future. They are driving but you are helping navigate their dreams.

Goal setting works best when you set 1, 5 and 10 year goals. Do you have to stick to this method? No. Should they all be career focused? No. That wouldn’t create balance in a person’s life and that is really important. I find it best to merge the following categories while goal coaching: personal, health, and career. Because you know their core values you’ll see a common thread between all the three.

There is no perfect formula to being a goal coach. It’s really about having a conversation that is completely dedicated to the person you’re coaching. Once you’ve set powerful goals with them your job is not over. Follow up with them regularly. Offer your support. Make sure they are taking actions NOW that will get them to their goals.

Now you have the tools. Go out there and change the world one goal at a time.

S